Tag Archives: funny

Big Brother = Big Liar

14 Jun

I love having a big brother.

In our adult, grown up years we have been great friends and have always been able to call the other when we needed something.

When we were younger though, things weren’t always so peachy. I was the annoying little sister always pestering and being nosy. He was the bully. Ok, he probably only bullied me but that totally counts.

I have dozens and dozens of stories where I was the innocent victim in “funny” games. Well, I probably wasn’t innocent. He glued my hair with rubber cement, handcuffed me and tripped me, tricked me into giving him all my candy, bloodied my nose and an assortment Β of other “fun” activities.

One of the best stories I remember though is when he came up with an elaborate lie. And when I say best, I mean I am still scarred til this day. The reason this lie seemed so life-changing was because my parents had agreed to go along with him and take part in the little joke. My mom said the main reason she agreed was because I always knew how to push my brother’s buttons when I was little. I knew the one thing to say to infuriate him, for some reason I have no recollection of this.

The story goes something like this….

He sat me down one day and told me he had something very serious he needed to share with me. He said that our family was a magical family and that everyone had secret powers but me. He assured me that they had all had the powers since before I was born but I wasn’t really one of them since I wasn’t magical. Now, I have always been very gullible and that wasn’t any different at about the age of 6. Of course I questioned him and didn’t fully believe it but how could I be sure? Then came the real kicker. “Go ask mama and daddy if you don’t believe me,” he said. I did just that. I marched my happy little butt into where my parents were and repeated Brian’s story. Then, I said, “that’s not true, right?” To my surprise, they both told me it was the truth. All of them said they just hadn’t wanted to tell me because they didn’t want me to be upset. Well, when you’re a kid and your parents tell you something you believe it. For some reason, not having magical powers was devastating to my little self.

As I recall there were tears and sobbing. They didn’t let it go on for longer than a day but it went on for several hours. So, once my parents told me they really weren’t a magic family I wasn’t sure what to believe. How could I be sure they weren’t just taking back their words to save me hurt and pain? I guess I eventually got over it and assumed if I hadn’t walked in on a magic spell yet that they really weren’t magic.

However, from time to time I wonder if they are all walking around casting their powers on things while I sit here with the power of nothing.

Guess I’ll never know….for sure:)

There Is A Ham In The Nursery

9 Mar

Oh wait, it’s just Lila πŸ™‚